How Christians Should Deal With Each Other's Opinions - Romans 14

Psalm 133:1 says, “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity!” What a wonderful statement. Sadly we Christians don’t always dwell in unity. In Romans 14 we find Paul continuing on in the topic of relationships, particularly directed at how Christians relate to each other when it comes to opinions. Paul opens up with a basic truth; there are many things in our lives that allow for differences in how we live.

Romans 14:1
As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.

There is two points to take hold of in this verse. First of all some of us are weaker than others in our faith. This isn’t the end of the world and probably we all have different points of weakness. The second point is that we will have differing opinions. That’s ok. But let’s not make them divisive issues when they are simple non-essential issues.

Two problems had risen up in the church at the time of Paul having written this letter. There were issues over what foods were ok to eat and over what days to celebrate. This was a natural situation that is easy to grasp. Jews and Gentiles were suddenly being mixed together into the new church. There was a danger of division over things that really were not that important. I think the best way to explain this is to say that simply some of us have certain convictions. Some would call these “gray” areas, things that are not strictly commanded for or against in scripture but are issues for some of us. For me alcohol is one of those areas. The Bible never says we cannot have a drink. But in my life God has told me I need to abstain. I cannot condemn others for drinking a beer. Paul’s point is that we need to respect each other in these areas of conviction. Here is Paul’s explanation.

Romans 14:5-8
One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.  The one who observes the day, observes it in honor of the Lord. The one who eats, eats in honor of the Lord, since he gives thanks to God, while the one who abstains, abstains in honor of the Lord and gives thanks to God.  For none of us lives to himself, and none of us dies to himself.  For if we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s.

What really matters is that in our heart we are in our own personal way trying to honor God.

Sometimes we have legitimate concerns over our Christian brothers and sisters’ behavior. Unless they are living in sin, and there is Biblical support for confronting true sin, we are to let people work out their own salvation.

Romans 14:10-12
Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God;  for it is written, “As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.”  So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.

Each of will answer to God.

Paul then makes a very important point.

Romans 14:13
Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.

We should never use our freedom in front of those who don’t have the same freedom. Again I use alcohol as an example. Drinking a beer is no sin. Drinking a beer in front of someone who struggles with a drinking issue is wrong and sinful. For you smokers who have tried to quit, you know how tempting that cigarette is that a co-worker is smoking. Paul’s point here is simple; don’t bring temptation to others. Sure maybe it is a weakness in them but as a fellow Christian we must help each other.

Romans 14:19
So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.

Paul again uses food as an example.

Romans 14:20-21
Do not, for the sake of food, destroy the work of God. Everything is indeed clean, but it is wrong for anyone to make another stumble by what he eats.  It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble.

Paul wraps up here with an admonition.

Romans 14:22-23
The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who has no reason to pass judgment on himself for what he approves.  But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.

Whatever does not proceed from faith is sin. That is a profound statement. I suggest each of us ask the Holy Spirit to make this real in our lives. We are called to be different and separate. We are called to be holy. Yet we need to tread carefully when imposing our calling unto others. Our Christian life requires something called discernment. This can only come through God’s power as made manifest though the indwelling Holy Spirit.

My prayer is that we all can dwell in unity and respect our differences. But we must never let sin take old. Sometimes we will differ in opinion. But the Bible is really quite clear on what sin is. Let us listen to it.